Funny Jokes
BEST FUNNY JOKES
Funny Jokesor clean funny jokes or Good Jokes or Cool Jokes are those jokes which could be viewed by a person of any age because it doesn't contain any adult content. These jokes are simple jokes but with a great fun and humor. Funny jokes are words communicated with the intent of being laughed at or found funny. Laughter is the biological reaction of people to humor and funny jokes. Our Funny jokes are healthy and are recommended to every human being daily. We have thousands of funny jokes for you. So what are you waiting for just enjoy these jokes.
Class Ki Bua
College mein ek badi umra ki ladki ko sab students bua bua kehte the
Ek din usne principal se shikayat kar di
Principal gusse mein class room mein pahunche aur class se kaha jo bhi is ladki ko bua kehta hai woh khada ho jaaye.
Ek ek karke saari class khadi ho gayi lekin ak ladka baitha raha
Principal ne poochha "To tum ise bua nahi kehte ho"
Ladke ne ek thandi saans li aur kaha "Main saari class ka foofa hoon."
Ek din usne principal se shikayat kar di
Principal gusse mein class room mein pahunche aur class se kaha jo bhi is ladki ko bua kehta hai woh khada ho jaaye.
Ek ek karke saari class khadi ho gayi lekin ak ladka baitha raha
Principal ne poochha "To tum ise bua nahi kehte ho"
Ladke ne ek thandi saans li aur kaha "Main saari class ka foofa hoon."
At Niagara Falls
At Niagara Falls
Guide: I welcome you all to Niagara Falls. There are the world's largest waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, even 20 supersonic planes passing by can't be heard.
Now I request the ladies to keep quite so that we can hear the Niagara Falls.
Guide: I welcome you all to Niagara Falls. There are the world's largest waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, even 20 supersonic planes passing by can't be heard.
Now I request the ladies to keep quite so that we can hear the Niagara Falls.
Feel The Difference
Real truth about proposal:
Boys always start love with this sentence "We are friends"
AND
Girls always end love with this sentence "We are just friends"
Feel the difference
Boys always start love with this sentence "We are friends"
AND
Girls always end love with this sentence "We are just friends"
Feel the difference
Presentation Does Matter
Two Wives chatting in office :
Wife 1 : I had a fine evening, how was yours?
Wife 2 : It was a disaster. My husband came home, ate his dinner in 3 mins & fell asleep in 2 mins.
How was yours?
Wife 1 : Oh mine was amazing!
My husband came home and took me out for a romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour.
When we came home he lit the candles around the house. It was like a fairy tale!
At the same time, their husbands are talking at work
Husband 1 : How was your evening?
Husband 2 : Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate & fell asleep.
And what about you?
Husband 1 : It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner, they cut the electricity because I forgot to pay the bill. So I took her out for dinner which was so expensive that didn't have money left for a cab or auto.
We walked home which took an hour & when we got home, I remembered there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house .
MORAL : PRESENTATION DOES MATTER......
NO MATTER WHAT THE REALITY IS
Wife 1 : I had a fine evening, how was yours?
Wife 2 : It was a disaster. My husband came home, ate his dinner in 3 mins & fell asleep in 2 mins.
How was yours?
Wife 1 : Oh mine was amazing!
My husband came home and took me out for a romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour.
When we came home he lit the candles around the house. It was like a fairy tale!
At the same time, their husbands are talking at work
Husband 1 : How was your evening?
Husband 2 : Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate & fell asleep.
And what about you?
Husband 1 : It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner, they cut the electricity because I forgot to pay the bill. So I took her out for dinner which was so expensive that didn't have money left for a cab or auto.
We walked home which took an hour & when we got home, I remembered there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house .
MORAL : PRESENTATION DOES MATTER......
NO MATTER WHAT THE REALITY IS
Headlines of 2050
Headlines of 2050:
1. Rajnikant in DHOOM 22
2. Golmaal-15 ready 4 release.
3. I will play the next world cup-Sachin.
4. Shahid, Saif attended Kareena's 8th wedding.
5. Petrol-984 rs/litre.
6. Shahrukh khan's daughter becomes a heroine with Amitabh Bachhan in a luv story titled: Cheeni Khatam
7. CID completd 10,00,000 episodes.
8. Nokia launches new phone..wid facilities lyk..20 sim card,500 gb in built memory, camera,music player,TV,fridge & washing machine in phone.
9.Ram gopal varma's phoonk-23 again failed at box office.
10. India beat brazil in fifa world cup.
1. Rajnikant in DHOOM 22
2. Golmaal-15 ready 4 release.
3. I will play the next world cup-Sachin.
4. Shahid, Saif attended Kareena's 8th wedding.
5. Petrol-984 rs/litre.
6. Shahrukh khan's daughter becomes a heroine with Amitabh Bachhan in a luv story titled: Cheeni Khatam
7. CID completd 10,00,000 episodes.
8. Nokia launches new phone..wid facilities lyk..20 sim card,500 gb in built memory, camera,music player,TV,fridge & washing machine in phone.
9.Ram gopal varma's phoonk-23 again failed at box office.
10. India beat brazil in fifa world cup.
Marriage
Dad : Son you have to get married I have seen a girl for u
Son:Not possible
Dad : Think twice she is Bill Gates daughter
Son: I m ready.
Dad goes to Bill Gates
Dad : My son wants to marry ur daughter
Bill Gates : Not possible
Dad : Think twice he is the CEO of Swiss Bank
Bill Gates : I m ready
Dad goes to Swiss Bank Authorities
Dad : Make my son the CEO of ur Bank
Authorities : Not possible
Dad : Think twice he is Bill Gates Son in Law
Authorities : Ur Sons job is confirmed
Son:Not possible
Dad : Think twice she is Bill Gates daughter
Son: I m ready.
Dad goes to Bill Gates
Dad : My son wants to marry ur daughter
Bill Gates : Not possible
Dad : Think twice he is the CEO of Swiss Bank
Bill Gates : I m ready
Dad goes to Swiss Bank Authorities
Dad : Make my son the CEO of ur Bank
Authorities : Not possible
Dad : Think twice he is Bill Gates Son in Law
Authorities : Ur Sons job is confirmed
What is Love
Question : What is love and explain in details ?.........(40 marks)
USA's Student.......
Answer: Love is life.
(marks : 10 from 40)
.
.
.
.
UK's Student......
Answer : Love is pain.
(marks : 10 from 40)
.
.
.
.
Indian Student........
Answer :
.
.
.
.
- Definition:
A serious disorder of heart due to relationship between men & women that can cause death of 1 or both depending on the resistance associated
- TYPES:
1 sided & 2 sided
- AGE:
Usually occurs in teenages but nowdays can be found in any age
- SYMPTOMS:
Tension
Daydreaming
Insomnia
Phone Addiction
- DIAGNOSIS BY:
Diary
Photos
Mobile
-TREATMENT:
Anti-LOVE therapy by Father's Shoe
or
Mother's Sandal......
(marks 40 from 40) Excellent !
USA's Student.......
Answer: Love is life.
(marks : 10 from 40)
.
.
.
.
UK's Student......
Answer : Love is pain.
(marks : 10 from 40)
.
.
.
.
Indian Student........
Answer :
.
.
.
.
- Definition:
A serious disorder of heart due to relationship between men & women that can cause death of 1 or both depending on the resistance associated
- TYPES:
1 sided & 2 sided
- AGE:
Usually occurs in teenages but nowdays can be found in any age
- SYMPTOMS:
Tension
Daydreaming
Insomnia
Phone Addiction
- DIAGNOSIS BY:
Diary
Photos
Mobile
-TREATMENT:
Anti-LOVE therapy by Father's Shoe
or
Mother's Sandal......
(marks 40 from 40) Excellent !
Quiz for Women
Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit the ground first?
A: Who cares, just throw them.
Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!
Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO ?
A: Dont know, havnt seen either.
Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business
Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!
Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract!
A: Who cares, just throw them.
Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!
Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO ?
A: Dont know, havnt seen either.
Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business
Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!
Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract!
Neither Logical Nor Legal
Chintu failed in Exam & decided to make a deal with Professor.
Chintu: Sir, Can I ask u one question
Professor: Yes.
Chintu: If u can answer dis question, I will accept my final marks, if u can't, u have to give me "A".
Professor agreed.
Chintu asked: "What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal & neither legal nor logical?"
Prof thought about it for hrs & pondered no answer.
He had to finally give up as he really did not know.
He gave the boy his "A".
The following day, professor asked same question to his students.
He was shocked when all of them raised their hands.
He asked one student.
Student answered: Sir, u are 65, married to 28 yrs old woman, this is legal but not logical.
Ur wife, is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, dis is logical but not legal.
Ur wife's boyfriend has failed in his exam & yet u have given him an "A", this is neither logical nor legal.
Professor Shocked!!!
Chintu: Sir, Can I ask u one question
Professor: Yes.
Chintu: If u can answer dis question, I will accept my final marks, if u can't, u have to give me "A".
Professor agreed.
Chintu asked: "What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal & neither legal nor logical?"
Prof thought about it for hrs & pondered no answer.
He had to finally give up as he really did not know.
He gave the boy his "A".
The following day, professor asked same question to his students.
He was shocked when all of them raised their hands.
He asked one student.
Student answered: Sir, u are 65, married to 28 yrs old woman, this is legal but not logical.
Ur wife, is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, dis is logical but not legal.
Ur wife's boyfriend has failed in his exam & yet u have given him an "A", this is neither logical nor legal.
Professor Shocked!!!
Vicious Circle
What is Vicious Circle:
The boss calls his secretary & says:
"Get ready for d weekend, We r going on a business trip."
The secretary calls husband & says:
"Me & my boss r going on a business trip for 2 days so takecare of urself"
The husband calls his girlfriend and says:
"My wife is going on a business trip come home we can have fun"
The girlfriend calls the boy to whom she gives tuition and says:
"No tuition this weekend."
The boy calls his father:
"Dad, at last we can spend this weekend together."
Dad (The boss) calls his secretary & says:
"Business trip is cancelled.
"I'm going to spend weekend with my son"
The secretary calls husband:
"I won't be going"
The husband calls his girlfriend:
"I am sorry My wife is not going "
The girlfriend calls boy:
"You have tuition"
Boy calls his father & says:
"Sorry Dad, I've classes"
The Dad calls his secretary.........
The boss calls his secretary & says:
"Get ready for d weekend, We r going on a business trip."
The secretary calls husband & says:
"Me & my boss r going on a business trip for 2 days so takecare of urself"
The husband calls his girlfriend and says:
"My wife is going on a business trip come home we can have fun"
The girlfriend calls the boy to whom she gives tuition and says:
"No tuition this weekend."
The boy calls his father:
"Dad, at last we can spend this weekend together."
Dad (The boss) calls his secretary & says:
"Business trip is cancelled.
"I'm going to spend weekend with my son"
The secretary calls husband:
"I won't be going"
The husband calls his girlfriend:
"I am sorry My wife is not going "
The girlfriend calls boy:
"You have tuition"
Boy calls his father & says:
"Sorry Dad, I've classes"
The Dad calls his secretary.........
EmoticonEmoticon